Alis Grave Nil

Wednesday 16 July 2014

Starsky & Hutch at the Commonwealth Games

Although I'm still getting over the trauma of a small child thinking I was his Grandma the other day, I wanted to keep you all updated on goings on at ground level at the Commonwealth Games in Parkhead, Glasgow.
 
According to my brother, Vasily, the whole area of Parkhead now looks like Northern Ireland during the troubles.  There are concrete barriers down all the main roads, checkpoints for cars going in and out of the area, hundreds of security guards.  Vasily was taking photos of it all when a policeman approached him and told him to stop.  He replied "I can take photos of what I want, I live on this street".  The policeman replied "Oh aye?  What number?" in a threatening manner.
 
Checkpoint Charlie, Parkhead, Glasgow July 2014
 
 
One of the main roads in Parkhead, Glasgow July 2014


 
 
There are CCTV cameras on every other lamp post and set of traffic lights, busy main roads have been closed and the locals are tearing their hair out at the major disruption.
 
There are unmarked police cars (which stick out like a sore thumb and everybody knows they are police cars) riding around doing their pre-large event practice, driving up to bus stops and jumping out like Starsky & Hutch and taking bemused old ladies' names and addresses. 
 
It amuses me the way they trail the Commonwealth baton round the world.  I just don't get that.  The news reporters take it all so seriously and I just think it is hilarious.  I saw a BBC reporter asking a young girl some questions about carrying the baton.

BBC NEWS REPORTER: "Was there any special training before you carried the baton?"

YOUNG GIRL: "Eh...no."

BBC NEWS REPORTER: "Was it difficult to carry?"

YOUNG GIRL: "Eh...no."

BBC NEWS REPORTER: "Right, moving on then..."


I will keep you updated if I can, mes amis.  My friend, Doreen, is taking part in the final ceremony so I will try and point her out if possible, when the time comes. 

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Monday 14 July 2014

On Getting Older

You just know you are getting older when a very small child in the supermarket runs towards you shouting in a very loud voice..."Gwanma, gwanma!"

ME: "Small child, I believe you have mistaken me for someone else".

Right then, I'm just off to touch up my roots.

Thursday 10 July 2014

Commonwealth Nonsense

Well, for someone who doesn't do sport, I have been blogging about it somewhat haven't I? The latest bit of nonsense has been brought to my attention by my sister, Katia.  She was on her way to Tesco in Parkhead, where she lives (why Katia, why?) and was stopped on the way by an official security man to have her documents checked.  Let me just explain.  The Commonwealth Games will take place in Parkhead, Glasgow shortly and the whole area has been made totally secure with roads closed off and hundreds of security guards guarding....well..empty car parks and roads. These security people are taking their jobs ever so seriously and Katia was stopped for a spot check yesterday on the road to Hell Tesco.  
 
Every householder in the area has a permit that has to be displayed on the dashboard of their cars and unfortunately for Katia, she forgot hers that day - bummer!  The 12 year old security man would not let her go any further and made her turn around.  I'm afraid she got rather angry and had a rant at him and then told him to poke the permit up his bottom.
 
My brother, Vasily, who also lives in the area (why Vasily, why?) told me that these checkpoint Charlies also stopped an ambulance and fire engine from getting through to render crucial assistance to the local residents.

More Scottish nonsense later, mes amis.

 
 
 

Wednesday 2 July 2014

It's all a Load of Tennis Balls

Am I the only one in this country to think that Andy Murray doesn't want to play tennis?  Honestly, he wasn't a bit bothered about getting a damn good thrashing by Gregor Dimitrov earlier today.  Murray is always angry but is probably too scared to tell his mum that he wants to give up tennis.  Admit it, guys, he's only mediocre, not brilliant like Federer or Nadal. Enough said.  I'm glad he's out now.  He's bloody miserable.
 
I'm also fed up with Formula 1 Champion Whinger, Lewis Hamilton, but I'm looking forward to a good spat between him and Nico Rosberg and I'm SO looking forward to him having his ass kicked by Team Manager, Niki Lauda, who hardly whinged at all when he was severely burned in a serious crash in the '70s (when men were men and didn't whinge).
 
Anyway, that's my take on sport in the UK at the moment.  Not sure who won the World Cup.